It's My Birthyear and I'll Cry If I Want To

Things have been tough around here. Mostly due to this cutey patootie.

My last update on her was her 4 month post where I said we were ending on an "up". Well right after that things went down hill. Way down hill. Poor little Lainey has had a lot of tummy and reflux troubles and there has been a lot of crying around here.

I had been cutting out dairy for a while, but then had a little bit one day and WOW things got bad. For about a week and a half she was not a happy camper at all. So much crying and SO MANY dirty diapers. It was out of control. We went to the doctor and had a little test done. So now I have to cut out all soy as well all dairy.

Things are still not back to normal, although they are improving I think. And with her I am not even sure what "normal" is because every week is so different. There has been a lot of crying and she wakes up a lot at night. Best case scenario for her is 2 wakings per night - around 11pm and 3am for feedings. But she often wakes up more than that - especially in the first few hours after putting her to bed. Her feedings are sometimes very challenging. She will pull off and on and cry and then cry when she is done eating.

If things don't get better we may have to try formula but I REALLY want to keep breastfeeding. Although sticking to this diet is really hard. But it is making me eat healthier. It seems like most all processed/packaged foods contain dairy and/or soy. So cutting those out has resulted in much cleaner eating. Actually I will save that for another post because we are trying to make some changes to our eating habits. 

So anyway, I am not trying to complain but just want to document the hard times as well as the good times. I have felt so stressed and anxious lately about her eating, her weight gain, her reflux, her dirty diapers, her development, etc. I really need to trust God and pray for wisdom on how to best care for her. I am so thankful for Lainey and I love her so much. She is little and sweet and I love her long eyelashes and her baby sounds and her little toes and her crazy kicking legs and all her baby-ness. I am thankful for her big sister who is so very sweet and patient with her. I am thankful for Greg who is such a good Daddy and gets up with her at night too. Children are a gift from The Lord and even though it is hard sometimes I wouldn't trade it for anything.